Always The Teacher Never The Student

I notice that people love being the teacher and not being the student. I've seen people who come from another art who need to learn BJJ and instead of using their time to learn that art, they waste their time explaining to the teacher and to the other students about their art, and why outside of this space they are still a capable student. But they came there to learn BJJ did they not?

Or a BJJ guy learning kickboxing, having to teach about his art. When its time to work on some technique or sparring, they may be seen in the corner showing how to takedown off of a clinch.

Or a kickboxer learning boxing, explaining, "well in my art, I stand like this because I am worried about kicks," or trying to teach kickboxing to his boxing instructor who he has hired and paid.

This doesn't just happens in martial arts. It happens in life as well. Someone who is in a really bad situation in life may give decide to lecture you on how to live. In personal training, I have clients try to teach me some work outs or weight loss tips, on their time, on their dime.

It's a form of projection. They aren't telling you, they are telling themselves they are valuable when no one cares or is questioning that. And its a waste of time and serves no purpose.

I have a thriving training business and often I will have other trainers remark how well I am doing, how they wished they were in my position. But never have any of them asked me how I got there, instead they use our time to tell me what they are doing, what they have done, what plans they have for their business, how great they are but just undiscovered, etc. None of which I care about, and its obvious they really came to me to see how I got there but that never comes up in the conversation. They get too busy talking about themselves when no one has asked.

Well I will tell you how I got here in business and to my level of proficiency in martial arts. I asked a ton of questions, I sought a lot of mentors as opposed to seeking students who I can talk about myself to. And the most important thing, I always pretended to know nothing even if I knew something in that area.

I too find myself projecting and defending myself when no one is attacking me or questioning my value. Then I realize what a waste of time it is. BJJ is about efficiency and this is not efficient. If you want to know how someone got to where they are, ask them. Don't go to them to find that out, but end up talking about yourself. Don't be that weird uncle who tells the rich nephew how he too is a great business man selling Amway and the nephew could learn a thing or two.

You Are Who Your Friends Are

They say your income is the average of the 5 people you hang out with the most... This may be an important thought to people who live and breathe the sport.

What's Most Important...

I had a client come in. Wanted to learn martial arts to help her with her anxiety. She performs classical music and the amount of stress and pressure of performing and auditioning and competing at a high level were wearing on her and she felt martial arts would help her fight this, along with helping her learn to protect herself, and work out some inner rage.

She told me she felt she needed a hardcore teacher. A bad ass who was in her face screaming. That's what she needed. Tough love. I asked her why she felt this way? She said her teachers tell her that's what she needs, that's already what she's used to, and its the only way to get good performances out of her. I saw where all this anxiety was now coming from. I told her that's not the type of coach I was, and that's not what she needed.

I handed her a stick. I told her to hold on to it. Then I tried to rip it out of her hand aggressively. Every time I did, she braced and clenched. Even when I pretended to grab it, and feinted, she still clenched. When I came at her slowly, more politely, more respectfully, she relaxed and allowed me to move her around with the stick. I told her when people come at her this hard way, that's her natural reaction. Freeze, clench, stress, and react also aggressively. When I came at her respectfully and controlled, she allowed me to move her, we created a mutual bond of trust. I told her then that people will come at her in life this way, but she is also coming at herself this way as well, she is coming at herself without respect, impolitely, aggressively. She needed to be easier on herself.

I asked her what's the most important thing she needs to learn from martial arts? What's the first thing she needs to learn? What does she need to get out of today?

She gave me varied answers. From relaxation and breathing, to learning how to kick and punch or defend a grab.

I told her all those things were important, but to me the most important thing is learning how to get up.

I told her to lie on the ground, and asked her if she knew how to get up without having someone kick her in the face? She realized she had no idea. The simplest thing, the thing taken most for granted.

I then demonstrated a way to get up without taking any damage.

I asked if she knew what I just showed her? She said I showed her how to get up.

I said no, I showed you how to rise against duress. Duress of any kind. Physical or mental or situational.

Martial arts to me is all about being able to get up, rise to the occasion, or keep picking yourself back up, against any stress, pressure, or attack. Whether it be mental, physical, emotional, financial, spiritual.

I told her she would perform as she trained. If I screamed at her, she would just be good at taking orders. cog on a ship. Not the captain of the ship. It's not about taking orders, its about mastering yourself. To master yourself, you need to learn to rise against any adversity.

Get up.

A True Master

Isn't someone who can beat everyone, or has mastered every technique, or someone who can even control his breath and all the functions of his body. A true master is someone who can control their own thoughts. You see the greatest fighters, martial artists, bad asses. If they have some fault or something wrong with their home life or some weakness, and they want to stop a habit or stop thinking something, or behaving in some way, they say they can't.

Or it's as simple as removing all negative self talk.

A true master is not the one who's mastered their body but the one who's mastered their thoughts.

Getting Older

A friend started BJJ as a young man. He was all about the sport, competing, seeing how he was against other competitors. Now he's gotten older and greyer. He said he tried fooling himself for a while, but he just isn't the same. He just can't hang with the young men who were like him when he started, hungry and fit, and needed to see how good they were.

Now his goal has changed. He didn't use to care about self defense before, but now that's why he trains. He trains to see if he can apply BJJ to keep himself safe at all times. 

He can't out sport a young man in that young man's game, but he can still continue to love the art. His goal in training is different so how he trains is different and the techniques he learns is different. And he is becoming a more complete martial artist as opposed to just a BJJ player.

Is your goal to be a BJJ competitor or a martial artist?

Vote For All Out Effort

As best in LA.

http://promo.rush49.com/best-of-la/best-killer-workout.php

Energy Debt

You've been training hard all week. Maybe twice a day a few times. Friday rolls around. One of your buddies comes in, he maybe trains 4 times a week. You feel you have surpassed them. You guys roll, and somehow he smashes you. What happened?

He is coming in the fresher while you are suffering from energy debt. You have spent more energy than you can recover from, and so at this point, your friend comes in with full energy.

Or you have been training super hard for a tournament, even to the final week. You go in and gas out, you are competing while you have energy debt. Or maybe you get a cold or flu because of the energy debt.

Instead of getting into your own head and questioning your skills or heart, it probably comes down to over training instead of optimal training. You can train and do strength and conditioning. But there definitely is an optimum amount to do both.

I think if your body can handle training 6 times a week. Then if you do 1 day of strength and conditioning,  you should only train 4 times unless its only temporarily leading up to something. Now if you can train 12 times a week, if you do strength and conditioning twice, you should only train 9 times. The mistake is people who train 12 times, do not make adjustments to training, just add S & C and train injured or sick all the time.

No Posts Explained

Sorry guys. Been busy opening up my own strength and conditioning studio in Hollywood!